My big brother lives with me here in this city, but he is older, married and has a kid, so I can't see him much, and when I do, he has his wife and kid with him. (Not a problem, I love you, sis!) We don't really get to get together much and do boy things.
My three or four best guy friends live in another city, and although we still communicate every day via text or facebook, we only get together once or twice a month in person.
Where I live, I don't really get any time to be social and let off steam with other guys. Some people might consider that growing up, but I don't know. I may be a bit of a hedonist, but in my experience, if it feels good, and I crave it, then there is probably a reason that I should be partaking in it.
A few weeks back, I was starting to feel myself get into a rut. It happens sometimes; work gets overwhelming, relationship grow tired or strained, the weather may be funky, there are millions of reasons that the average resonating emotional level may dip. (It may even be the much alluded to man-struation) But for whatever reason, things weren't looking up naturally as they tend to do for me.
At the same time, it was grating on me that it had been a long time since I have spent some quality, in-person time with my guy friends, just shooting the shit and doing boy things. I hadn't put these two facts together in my head quite yet, but don't worry, I got there eventually.
I went to go see my friends, and of course, had a great time. We didn't break any laws, but we behaved like hooligans, obnoxiously, and let a little bit of our natural testosterone-ignited belligerence out. It felt great, like it always did. And when I returned, I found an emotional strength and resilience that I had temporarily lost.
It occurred to me then that it was important that I should seek out bro-time because it was obviously healthy for my mood and, by extension, my hormonal health. I did a little bit of research.
Several studies, example, have shown that it is beneficial to a man's mental health to get together with other guys (small group of around four) and just "do things."
My friends and I like to speculate that it is testosterone pheromones in the air, infusing and creating a positive feedback loop of masculinity, which is probably true to some degree, but for the most part, it may just be the power of connecting closely and intimately with another person. Other theories is that a group such as this is the perfect incubator for laughter, emotional expression and candidness, which multiple studies have determined conclusively have a magical effect on mental health, physical health and even alleviate symptoms of depression.
The stress-relieving time spent with other guys can be any sort of thing, most studies cite activities like playing/watching sports, getting some beers at a pub and complaining about the women in their lives, or just chilling on the couch and playing a round of Halo.
Regardless, the benefits are immediately obvious, statistically supported, and anecdotally effective. I have resolved to go out of my way to spend extra time in person with my guy friends, and so should you.
Sometimes you have to go out with the boys and do boy things.
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